Rather Be
by Artemis Day
Summary: My entries for Pepperony Week 2017.
1. Touch

**A/N: I should've started posting these yesterday, but better late than never. Here are my entries for this year's Pepperony Week!**

* * *

Tony Stark had rough hands, calloused hands, hands he'd used to build and to kill.

Hands which had held a new element created to sustain his own life. Hands which had carried a missile into space to save an entire city from annihilation. Hands which had never born anything like the small, wriggling bundle sleeping against his chest.

He'd had to sit down when the doctor put her in his arms. The second his fingers found the cottony pink blankets, his legs gave out. He'd practiced this for months with an animatronic of his own design. Pepper had wanted to buy a doll, but as far as Tony was concerned, those plastic baby faces shot straight past okay and into the uncanny valley. If Tony had to learn how to change diapers, he wasn't doing it with a pair of soulless black eyes staring at him.

Nothing could have prepared him for the reality of holding a baby. His foot long bot weighed roughly ten pounds and felt like cradling a carburetor. His daughter was eight pounds, nine ounces. A big baby, he was told. He believed it. She was one pound lighter than the bot but somehow heavier.

She was softer too, and she moved naturally, her arms flailing as she yawned and fell asleep. She'd come out screaming. She had a voice like her mother's. When Tony brushed her chubby cheek, her skin was smooth like Pepper's, too. Smoother even. He remembered the first time he'd held Pepper, how he'd wished his hands weren't dirty and blood-soaked. Those same thoughts invaded as he held their baby. He shouldn't touch her with these hands. He was sullying her innocence.

He closed his eyes and let her tiny hand wrap around his finger. This kid knew nothing yet of the family she'd been born into. She had no idea what the hands holding her had done, and if she did, she wouldn't care because he'd always be her daddy. That's what Pepper said when she pressed his open palm into her swollen stomach, rolling her eyes if he flinched, glowing when he felt a kick.

"So this is what all the fuss is about," he whispered, bouncing her softly on his leg. "Gotta admit, I like them a lot more than the bot."

"Me too," Pepper said, rocking a blue bundled baby back and forth, kissing his tiny forehead. "Let me know when you're ready to trade off, okay?"


	2. Pre-Relationship

Pepper was having a bad week.

No, that was an understatement. In the thirty plus years Virginia Potts had been on earth, never had any week been as frustrating, debilitating, or miserable as the one she'd just had.

Starting bright and early Monday morning, a pipe burst in her apartment, ruining sixty percent of her wardrobe and rendering her brand new flat screen TV a useless hunk of junk after the water seeped into the outlet. The next day, her landlord called to inform her that due to a clause of a clause in her lease, he was under no obligation to fix the damages and she had a week to get a plumber or else she could kiss her deposit goodbye. On Wednesday, someone stole her car. On Thursday, it was found sans tires in a parking garage two miles away. On Friday, Matthew, her boyfriend of nine months, told her over dinner that it wasn't working out and he wanted to see other people. Said person being the curvy blonde she caught him making out with in the park on Saturday.

By the time Sunday rolled around, she was on her last legs. Her bank account had never looked more depressing and she'd expended all her optimism hoping the plumber would charge her a hundred dollars less than he had. A call came in at one, interrupting her game of solitaire.

"Ms. Potts, I'm so sorry to bother you, but I have the board of directors on line two. Mr. Stark missed their meeting and they're demanding to speak to you."

Pepper silenced the call. She didn't need ten voices yelling at her when her ears were already steaming. Tony's office was separated from hers by a wall of bulletproof, but not soundproof glass. He was in there right now, chatting up girlfriend number 394 without a care in the world while everyone around him was in Hell. He didn't look up when Pepper walked in, not until she plucked the phone out of his hand and dropped it on the desk.

"You had a meeting an hour ago," she said. He opened his mouth, either to answer or to ask for his phone back, but he wasn't getting an inch from Pepper today. "Don't say you'll make it up to them. Don't say you're the boss so the meeting starts when you say it starts. All of that is bullshit and we both know it. Now I have been having the worst time these last few days, so if you think you can make my life more difficult and get away with it, you'd better think again. You are going to get off your lazy ass, apologize to the board, and the next time you have a meeting you are going to be there ON TIME. NO EXCUSES!"

Pepper slammed her fist on the desk, which was a stupid move because now her hand was throbbing. Tears prickled her eyes and she turned away before he saw. That would be the icing on this seven layer shit cake that was her life.

Tony's chair squeaked, and he moved around his desk hopefully to go be responsible for once and own up to his mistakes. Instead, a pair of arms wrapped around Pepper from behind, pulling her back into a hard chest. Tony's head rested on her shoulder, just out of view. Seconds passed and he neither moved nor faded into the ether, leaving Pepper to conclude this was actually happening.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Hugging you," Tony said like this was something he did every day. "It was to my understanding that when someone is upset, they like to be hugged. Releases endorphin or something. Makes them feel better."

"Where did you read that?"

He shrugged. "Can't remember. On a plane maybe? Definitely not mine. Books are the last thing you need on my plane unless those books contain words like tantric and-"

"Tony, we're having a nice moment here," Pepper said, patting his hand. "I'm starting to feel a tiny bit better. Don't ruin it."

"Gotcha." Tony rocked her, sort of like a slow dance without music, but that was a train of thought Pepper would rather jump off a building than go down. Not so soon after a breakup and _definitely_ not with Tony Stark. "I'm sorry about your apartment and your car and Mitchell."

"Matthew."

"Do you care?"

Fair point.

"How do you know about all that?" she asked, pulling away slightly. He took that as an invite to hug her from the front, and now Pepper had her face buried in his neck. He smelled good, way better than Matthew.

"Genius intuition obviously," he said, "also you were on the phone with the cops and your landlord the other day. We should think about soundproofing that wall."

"I'll make a note of it," Pepper said, even though she wouldn't. "Well, thanks for cheering me up."

He grinned.

"Now about the board of directors."

His face fell. "Tomorrow."

"No, you have to see them today."

"But I helped you. Do me a solid, Potts."

"I'll do you one by making sure you don't get bought out of your own company."

"Please? I'll buy you a new car. Or a new house. Or we can test the new missile prototype on Mitchell's place."

"Mr. Stark," Pepper used her 'mom' voice, the one she'd learned from her mother on the off chance she had kids of her own. Working with Tony Stark, she'd have all those instincts satisfied before she was forty. "I'll let the board know to expect you in an hour."

"Okay," Tony whined, his tone so exaggerated it took him a good five seconds to get off the second syllable. "All three offers still stand! Especially the Mitchell one!"

Pepper shook her head, amusement and bemusement warring in her thoughts. Tony Stark was by far the most outlandish human being she had ever met. The crazy part was that sometimes, she thought she could fall for him. But that would take a miracle and a half.


	3. FamilyKids

"Remind me why we're babysitting Loki's daughter?"

Pepper didn't pause reading her book. "Because she's also Jane's daughter and Jane is one of your best friends. And because I'm due in three months and both of us need to get used to having kids around."

"Can't we just watch videos like the other parents?" Tony grumbled, his arms crossed over his chest.

"We tried that and you fell asleep," Pepper replied.

"Not my fault they waste time with boring stuff like breathing and… breathing. I don't even remember what else. That's how dull it was. Like watching paint dry."

Pepper rolled her eyes as she marked her place in 'What to Expect When You're Expecting'. It was a quarter to one and according to the schedule Jane left, it was time for Christina to have lunch. Grilled cheese with the crusts on and celery sticks. A sure pleaser for the magically inclined toddler.

Getting up, she bumped into a doll flying through the air, guided by what Loki referred to as 'a basic levitation spell'. If this was what sorcerers considered basic, Pepper didn't want to know what the advanced stuff was like.

"Sorry Aunt Pepper!" Christina called out from across the room. She'd made herself a spot by the window. Crayons were everywhere and ten more dolls hovered in a circle over her head. Most were ponies, but a couple, like the one Pepper had just been introduced to, were human.

"That's okay, sweetheart. Be more careful next time."

She waddled to the kitchen, taking careful, calculated steps. The last time she saw her feet was Thanksgiving. Just part of having two babies to carry instead of one. Getting the bread and cheese, she stayed close to the living room, watching Christina play and Tony polish one of his helmets.

"Uncle Tony, when are the babies coming?" Christina asked.

"Soon," he said, throwing the dirty rag aside for someone else to pick up. "The doctors are thinking late March."

"I was born in June."

"I know."

"Like my mommy."

"I know."

"When were you born?"

"In May."

"When was Aunt Pepper born?"

"September."

"Do you know when daddy was born?"

"The Proterozoic Era."

Christina blinked a few times. She tilted her head to one side. "What's that?"

"It means your dad's been around a long time," Tony grinned, and he was lucky Loki wasn't here or he'd be bald for a month again. "A really really really really really really really long time."

"That's a lot of reallys."

"Damn right it is."

"Tony!" Pepper brought the freshly made sandwich and a few small stalks of celery out on a plate. "Language."

"You sound like Cap during his weird period," said Tony. "All I said was damn. Not like I called him a shi-"

"Okay, enough of that, time to eat." Pepper beckoned Christina to come sit on the couch, just in time for the phone to ring with Loki's number flashing on screen. Tony reached for it, but Christina was quicker.

"Hi Daddy. I'm having lots of fun with Aunt Pepper and Uncle Tony. Uncle Tony was just saying how you're really old, but he used more reallys."

Pepper shot Tony a 'now you're gonna get it' look, which he countered with a 'please what's the worst that could happen?' look. As if years of dealing with Loki's antics hadn't taught him this exact lesson twenty times over.

"Okay, bye Daddy. I love you!" Christina hung up, then turned to Tony with a confused expression. "Daddy said he's gonna show you what old is, but I don't know what that means."

A tiny pop like a lightbulb burning out followed. Christina's eyes bugged out and then she dissolved into laughter, her little body doubling over. Pepper hated to admit it, but she could relate.

"Oh my god," she gasped, pointing at Tony's head.

"What? What did he do?" Tony felt at his hair desperately, ensuring it was all still intact and where it belonged on his scalp. He grabbed the helmet, it's shiny surface reflecting back at him a head of snowy white hair. The helmet slid out between his sweaty fingers. "LOKI!"


	4. QuotesLyrics

Tony was minding his own business. In his basement, working on his suit, continuing his never-ending quest to protect the world from evil, and then Pepper marched downstairs like she owned the place- which she sort of did now that they were engaged but whatever- and had the unmitigated gall to derail his train of thought by _turning off his music!_

Without the shredding guitar riffs and primal drum beats, his workshop felt small and empty. Pepper's heels clicked on solid concrete, but as sexy as those stilettos were, this was not 'Tony and Pepper crazy love time', it was 'Tony working alone by himself with music loud enough to make your chest hurt' time.

"You know, Pep, sometimes I think you spend too much of your free time watching All My Children," Tony said, dropping his soldering gun on a table crowded with fifty more tools. "I don't shut the TV off on you, though."

"Tony, you handed Stark Industries over to me almost seven years ago."

"That I did," Tony said, "and you're reminding me because…"

"Because you seem to have forgotten how difficult running a multi-billion dollar company is," she was using her low, dangerous voice. 'Have fun sleeping on the couch until the sun blinks out,' it said. "I have a mountain of paperwork to get through today, and I bring it home with me so I don't have to sleep in my office."

"Which I appreciate more than you know."

"Oh, I think I could know a little more. You have that noise blasting so loud I can hear it from upstairs."

Tony furrowed his brow. "That sounds wrong. Need to reinforce the walls again."

"You could also lower the volume," Pepper seethed. Her face was redder than her hair. "Or if you have to blast music, maybe try some easy listening."

Tony gasped, for never in his life had a more appalling suggestion been made in his presence. "My playlist is made up of only the greatest classics of our modern musical age. Comparatively, let's see what you listen to."

And just like that, all of Pepper's anger melted away, replaced with fear and preemptive mortification which he'd surely pay for later. Again, the couch…

"Tony, don't-"

"FRIDAY, pull up Pepper's itunes library and let's see what we've got."

"Sure thing, boss."

"FRIDAY, don't you dare!"

It was far too late. The great thing about AIs running your home was how speedy and efficient they were. The instant the command was out of his mouth, all twenty-two hundred of Pepper Potts's favorite songs were on screen, lined up alphabetically by artist name. Tony whistled.

"That's a lot of Backstreet Boys."

"Tony, shut that off!" Pepper tried to cover his view with her body, but as tall as those heels were, they didn't have flight boosters.

"Why are you embarrassed? Those guys owned the nineties. It's completely reasonable and logical for you to be a fan..

"Tony…"

"And a Britney Spears fan, too. Oh wow, you even have b-sides and unreleased songs."

"Tony!"

"Let's go a little further down the list, FRIDAY." He watched the many names flash from Bs to Cs. Halfway through the Cs, Tony threw up a hand. "Stop. That's that song I heard everywhere in 2014, isn't it? Rather something or other. That's a good song."

"Tony, if I promise never to complain about your music again, will you stop?" Pepper was practically begging, and he would've done anything she asked based on that alone.

"On one condition," he said.

"What condition?" she asked apprehensively.

Tony paused for dramatic effect, and then he pointed for dramatic effect. He was feeling dramatic today. "FRIDAY, play."

The song's melodious strings filtered through the speakers. Tony took Pepper by the hand, leading her away from the clutter to a clean patch of floor perfect for dancing.

"Are you kidding me?" Pepper shook her head as Tony took the lead. "Tony, this isn't exactly a slow dance kind of song."

"So what? It's not like we're in public. We are alone except for robots and I promise I'll have FRIDAY delete all the footage before it hits youtube."

"Tony…"

"That time I was kidding."

They moved completely out of sync with the up-tempo pop beats, but if either of them cared, they'd never voice it. Pepper's body fit perfectly against his like they were two halves becoming whole again. He'd have to disagree with her about this song not being appropriate. Listening to the lyrics, it made all the sense in the world to him.

 _'When I am with you there's no place I'd rather be.'_

* * *

 **A/N: Hope that wasn't too sappy for you guys.**


	5. Post-Civil War

Pepper had a list hidden away in a secret folder on her computer. The title was a series of random letters and numbers achieved by closing her eyes and hitting eleven random keys. Any hacker or burglar would write it off as junk and move on, or so she hoped. Every couple of days she'd go into the folder and open the single file inside.

 _Reasons Why I Should Permanently Break Up With Tony_

 _1: He's completely unreliable. He can't shake bad habits and he can't keep promises._

 _2: He's full of himself. Even when he's saving people there's this stink of arrogance like he thinks he's owed something for it._

 _3: He hogs the bedsheets at night._

 _4: His idea of date night is making a Pepper sized suit and racing around the world._

 _5: David, the deputy director of R &D, is clearly interested in me and is a really sweet guy I'd be lucky to have._

 _6: He's never going to stop being Ironman, which means he's never going to stop risking his life, which means I'll always have to fear for his life when he's on missions._

There was no point in rereading the list, she had it memorized by now. The latest news report of Captain America's prison breakout and subsequent disappearance as he and his accomplices went on the lam played outside Pepper's door. Interns and secretaries argued passionately about the proceedings, and from what little Pepper picked up, it seemed Stark Industries was evenly split between supporting Cap and supporting Tony. She hoped no reporters would be asking for her opinion. At this point, she had no idea what she would say, only that it would be loud and mostly censored.

She hit enter, going down to the next line.

 _7: He signed government paperwork without consulting SI's legal department even though he knows damn well we have the best lawyers in the country who would have weeded out any vague wording or hidden clauses and maybe prevented this massive shitstorm. Or at least contain it._

She added a few expletives, only to delete them right after. It was more effective and less painful than punching the wall, and better on her voice than calling him and screaming in his ear. She sat slumped over, staring at the modern art piece above her couch. Tony had scoffed the first time he saw it. He thought it looked like a ten-year-old playing with MS paint. Now that she thought about it, this painting was pretty basic. Just a straight line on a white background. She could do that in two seconds

An alert came up on her instant messenger and her heart stopped. She had several hundred contacts, mostly business partners who messaged her daily for status updates. Realistically, she shouldn't assume it was Tony when there was only a one in three hundred chance she was right. Except she was pretty sure most of the other two hundred and ninety-nine people with her info couldn't activate her messenger remotely when she didn't even have the app open.

 **TStark:** Hey Pep!

Two words after a month of no contact with an exclamation point at the end. Yup, that was Tony.

 **TStark:** Sorry if you're busy but I wanted to talk.

 **TStark:** Nothing important, just thinking of you. :)

Smileys were new, though.

 **TStark:** Okay, that's not entirely true, a lot of important stuff is going on. And you probably know most of it.

 **TStark:** You probably want to yell at me.

"Bingo," Pepper muttered.

 **TStark:** That is absolutely fine. You can scream your head off until I go deaf and I will take it. I know I messed up. I know I should've talked to you. Believe me, it's all I've been thinking about for weeks (okay maybe not all I've been thinking about but you know since we're on a break nighttimes have been kind of lonely so…).

Pepper giggled. Damn Tony and his charm even when he was trying to grovel. He could drown a bag of puppies and crack jokes about it, and he'd still get a laugh out of her.

 **TStark:** I mean, if I were you I'd be on the phone laying into me for hours. Of course, I could never do it as well as you. Have I ever thanked you for consistently taking me down a peg every day for the past twenty years?

 **TStark:** If I haven't, let me give you a kiss right now.

There was a kiss emoji at the end of that comment. In fact, there were several. At least fifteen by Pepper's count. It made her think of his real lips, how full and pink they were. The way his facial hair tickled her skin when they kissed. The glorious beard burn she got when she spread her legs and let him-

"Ms. Potts, the deputy director of finances for you on line two."

Pepper coughed, though there was nothing in her throat. "Thanks, Sylvia. Would you take a message? I'm in the middle of an important meeting."

Tony had sent three more messages when she checked again.

 **TStark:** Anyway, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to meet up sometime? Not for a date or anything, just to talk. I miss our talks.

 **TStark:** Also Dum-E misses you. I swear I caught him crying the other day over a picture of you. It was weird, but I'm not one to judge.

 **TStark:** We don't have to go out. We could eat at Chez My Kitchen. I think I've finally perfected my omelet making technique.

 _'That'll be the day,'_ she thought. Her hands inched towards the keyboard, fingers burning and mind filling with words and phrases and things that simply had to be said no matter where they went from here.

One more message appeared before she could.

 **TStark:** I just miss you, Pepper. I miss you so much.

Her heart didn't twist because it had been aching since his first 'Hey Pep'. She pictured him at his desk, or in his suit dictating to FRIDAY, eyes bloodshot and body ragged from life and supersoldier fists beating down on him. He looked no better than she felt.

Her list was minimized at the bottom of the screen. Clicking on it, Pepper read it one more time. Seven perfectly understandable reasons why they weren't meant to be. Why if she did meet him, they should part ways as amicable friends, ready to move on to a new chapter in life.

By the time Pepper got to the last line, she was more convinced than ever that breaking up with Tony was the best thing for both of them… and so she scrolled down to the next page.

 _Reasons Why I Should Stay With Tony_

 _1: Tony has done more to better himself than anyone I've ever met. He'll always have flaws, but who doesn't? And who else would work so hard to overcome their flaws even if they still make mistakes?_

 _2: He cares so much about helping people, even when he pretends it's all for an ego boost. He'll go to Hell and back to protect the world._

 _3: I drink milk from the carton when I'm too lazy to use a glass so I guess I owe him the sheets._

 _4: And having my own suit would be kind of cool even though it's also terrifying._

 _5: David from R &D has awful hair and only ever talks about soccer. I hate soccer. I'd be bored to tears with him._

 _6: Becoming Ironman was the best thing Tony ever did and it made him the man I fell in love with. The man I'll always love._

Oh yeah, that's right. How could she have forgotten?

Pepper smiled and pulled the chat window up.

 **PPotts:** I miss you, too.


	6. AU

**A/N: This is a high school AU technically, but it's more specific than that, and if you know the source material, you'll pick up on it fast. :D Even if you don't, I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Pepper Potts was not a genius, nor was she a prodigy. She understood how one could make that mistake, given she'd been selected out of hundreds of applicants to receive a full scholarship to Shield Academy. It was dumb luck, though. Her test scores were good and her admissions essay meticulously tailored to meet all of the school board's criteria for entry. If she was anything, it was an expert at kissing up and look how far it had gotten her.

Now she attended classes with the children of CEOs, governors, even a prince. All the professors were Ivy league. The cafeteria was run by twelve gourmet chefs. Her entire apartment building could fit in the swimming pool with room to spare. Most impressive were the four libraries, each two floors and carrying books in every language known to man, including one she was fairly certain was written in Klingon. Every day after her last class, Pepper withdrew into the far corner of the first library, next to the business management and law texts, and there she remained until six o'clock rolled around and it was time to go home.

On this day, a sudden influx of students loitering in the first library rendered her usual study spot uninhabitable. Going down the line from the second to the fourth libraries, she found much the same situation. One thousand students at Shield and every one of them had chosen today to visit the library. They weren't even studying. No one had books out, no one was taking notes, and everyone in the computer lab had nothing better to do than browse Facebook.

"Four libraries in this place and not a single one I can study in," Pepper muttered, going up the stairs to an empty wing. "Not everyone has enough money to coast through life, you know. Some of us have to work."

At the end of the hall was an abandoned club room. Something something music, according to the faded sign. Checking the door, Pepper found it was unlocked. Weird. Every other door she'd tried had been bolted. At least now she had a quiet place to do her homework.

As soon as Pepper opened the door, a barrage of noise hit her, not the musical kind either. Seven people occupied the music room, which had been converted into some kind of laboratory. Metal parts were strewn everywhere. Computer screens with three-dimensional models lined the walls. Five toddler sized robots glided around her legs, seemingly of their own volition. One lifted its head at her, a red beam spreading over her body until a green check mark appeared where the eyes should be and it rolled on.

One man sat at a table covered in similar, unfinished robots. He had an old circuit board which he was taking apart and sorting (she assumed) between usable and unusable components. One pile was larger than the other, but before Pepper could work out which was which, he looked up.

"Hello," he said, smiling wide. "Welcome to the Shield Academy Scientific Research club."

Suddenly, all noise ceased, and twelve more eyes were on Pepper. Now that her head was clear, she recognized all of them from classes and schoolyard gossip. On the left were Bruce Banner and Betty Ross, power couple and darlings of the biochemistry department. She'd never seen either of them in person before, but they were unmistakeable from their pictures in the local paper last week. 'High School Students Make Strides in Stem Cell Research' the headline read. Behind them, Jane Foster and Loki Odinson debated the solution to a Ph.D. level dimensional equation written across three whiteboards. Helen Cho had a model DNA strain projecting from her watch of all things. Peter Parker, the real child prodigy around here at just twelve years old, had a mountain of books on his desk and a notebook full of formulas.

Last but not least, the one who had greeted her. Tony Stark, son of Howard Stark, an innovator long before his time. Capable of building functioning robotics before he hit puberty, or so the rumors said.

And then there was Pepper, who was beginning to think she'd never get her math homework done.

"Uh… I'm sorry," she said. "I thought this room was empty."

"It's cool," said Tony. "We don't get many visitors here, and unless I'm mistaken, you're Pepper Potts, right?"

Pepper blinked. She went through all seven of her classes and Tony Stark was in none of them. "How do you know my name?"

"Doesn't everybody?" Tony asked. "Hey Loki, you have a class with Pepper, right?"

"Two," Loki said while erasing and rewriting part of the equation, "though I have yet to make her acquaintance. Perhaps if you don't scare her away with your bumbling attempts at flirting, Stark…"

"Excuse me, I don't bumble," Tony glared. He turned back to Pepper. "Don't mind him. He's the vice-president but he thinks he controls everything behind my back."

"I do control everything."

"Shut up, Shadow King," Tony snapped. "Anyway, what can we do for you, Pepper? Need a death ray to deal with the snotty girls in the locker room?"

"No, no, I'm fine," Pepper backed up. "I'm sorry for bothering you, but I just wanted a quiet place to studEEK!"

Something was under her foot. Pepper slid off balance and landed square on her butt. A crash came from somewhere to her left, and as the pain subsided enough that she could look, her heart stopped. The little robot which had scanned her earlier was on the floor in pieces. Three to be exact. The body was split in two from the impact, wires fizzling and throwing out weak sparks. The head was upside down, 'SYSTEM OFFLINE' flashing across the screen in red letters before it too died.

Such a pitiful sight the little robot was, Pepper couldn't look away. Or maybe it was because Tony Stark was standing over her, his smile gone and a deep set frown etched in its place.

He whistled. "Bad move, Potts. That thing cost me seventy thousand to make."

" _Seventy thousand dollars?_ " Pepper screamed. That was more money than she'd ever seen in her life! And now she'd destroyed it…

"Actually seventy-one if we're getting specific," Tony said.

"For all that money you'd think it would be sneaker resistant," Loki snidely remarked, earning a poke from Jane and an eye roll from Tony.

"First off, Ms. Potts is wearing loafers. Second, most of these parts were vintage so they cost extra. Third, shut up." Pepper had a feeling most of their conversations ended like that, and it would be funny if she hadn't just gotten herself into the most unfunny situation of all time. "So, let's talk about how you're going to pay me back."

Pepper shook her head. "I- I know I have to, I just… I don't-"

"Relax, I already have a plan," Tony said, offering her a hand up. She took it nervously. Was he going to drop her halfway or put her in some futuristic handcuffs and lead her away to a detention cell? Whatever he did, Pepper knew she wouldn't like it. Letting her go, Tony threw out a hand, pointing dramatically. "Starting today, Ms. Virginia 'Pepper' Potts, you will work off your debt by acting as the Scientific Research club's personal assistant. You'll answer the phone, draft emails, organize our appearances at local and national competitions, and get us coffee. Right now. The coffee, I mean. Go get us some coffee."

"I- I-"

"Oh and, we've already filled our quota of women in the club, so we're gonna have to cut your hair short and pretend you're a boy."

"WHAT?"

"I'm kidding!" Tony laughed. "We have no quotas. We do need coffee, though. Black for everyone except Bruce. He gets decaf. Chop chop!"

Tony gathered the broken robot in his arms and returned to his table. One by one, the rest of the club followed suit, going back to their daily routines like nothing had happened. Pepper was frozen, unable to move for a longer time than she knew. Tony glanced away from his work once to wink and point at the high tech coffee machine in the far corner. Pepper shuffled towards it like a zombie, ignoring the minor flip of her stomach as his eyes lingered on her.

He could look all he wanted, but that was all he'd ever do. If Pepper had to spend her high school years enslaved to a bunch of mad scientists, that was fine, but as soon as her debt was paid, she was out of here. She'd never see Tony Stark again, and she was _definitely_ not going to fall for him.


	7. Free Day

**A/N: Thank you all for your comments and faves!**

* * *

Nick Stark's first word was creampuff, and there was a funny story behind it. Tony had realized early in his children's' lives that with his personality, he was eternally consigned to the role of 'fun' parent. Embracing his destiny wholeheartedly, he took to bringing them along on his weekly Avengers training days. With Happy to watch over them in the stands behind reinforced plate glass, the two thirteen month olds gurgled and laughed as their badass action dad handed his teammates their collective asses. His newest suit came with an upgraded anti adhesive gel which rendered Peter's synthetic web useless.

"Come on, Creampuff, gotta do better than that," Tony grinned as Peter paused to catch his breath and recharge his web shooters. Baby Nick clapped his hands, his tiny red covered feet flailing in the air. Tony's heart melted. "What do you think, Nick? Should the creampuff here hit the showers?"

"Creampuff!"

His enunciation wasn't perfect, but the word rang out loud and clear. All training had to be postponed until next week as Tony dragged Happy and the twins straight to Pepper's office. They cooed over their son and filmed him shouting his new word for hours. From then on, anytime Nick caught a glimpse of Peter, he'd point and yell 'Creampuff!" at the top of his lungs. Peter, while annoyed at first, got used to it surprisingly fast.

"It's better than Penis Parker," he said.

With Nick's first word out of the way, attention shifted to Sophie. Born three minutes before her brother, she nevertheless had only baby words to say. Her attempts at language resembled someone trying to speak with their mouth full, but Tony didn't fret. The day was coming when his baby girl would open her mouth and speak her mind, and he knew exactly what she'd say.

"Daddy," he said slowly, making both syllables as clear as possible. Sophie stared at him, her brown eyes wide and inquisitive, but her mouth stayed shut. "Come on, Sophie. Say Daddy. Da-ddy."

"I thought we agreed we weren't doing that anymore," Pepper said, entering the kitchen with Nick in her arms.

"I'm just bonding with my baby girl. Nothing wrong with that," Tony said. "Isn't that right, Sophie? Your daddy loves hanging out with you and having daddy daughter time because he's such a good daddy."

"Creampuff!" Nick shouted.

Sophie let out a stream of incomprehensible babble. To Tony's frustration, none of it sounded remotely like 'daddy'. Pepper shook her head.

"Here, take Nick," she said, handing him the baby boy. She took his place at Sophie's side, wiping a spot of strained peas off her cheek. "Sophie will talk when she's ready to talk and it doesn't matter if she says Mommy or Daddy first."

Pepper tickled Sophie, making her giggle. The sound was infectious, and every ounce of negativity within Tony vanished as Nick fell asleep in his arms and Sophie reached her chubby hand out to him. To think, he used to find babies annoying. Tony carried Nick to the nursery and laid him gently in his crib. He wrapped a blanket around him and placed his favorite stuffed robot where he could grab it. Going back to the kitchen, Sophie's laughter and Pepper's soft voice caressed his ears.

"Sophie, look at Mommy!" Pepper sang. "You love your mommy, don't you? Say mommy, Sophie. Mo-mmy."

"A-HA!" Tony leaped into the room, pointing an accusing finger at Pepper. "What do we have here?"

Pepper turned bright red. "I was just playing with the baby."

"You were trying to make her say Mommy!" Tony planted himself between Pepper and the baby, blocking her view. "It doesn't matter what she says first, huh?"

Pepper's cheeks puffed out. This was the most awake either of them had been in close to a year and it showed. "Well, I just think after carrying her and her brother _at the same time_ for nine months, I deserve a little recognition."

"Oh yeah? Who's the stay at home parent ninety percent of the time? It's sure not you, Ms. CEO. Do you know how many diapers I change a day? _Do you know how many?_ "

Someone coughed and they managed to break eye contact long enough to spot Happy Hogan standing awkwardly in the doorway. He balanced on his heels, hands in his pockets, looking like he regretted his life choices.

"Sorry to bother you," he said. "Are you guys busy?"

Tony relaxed as Sophie bounced in her seat, reaching desperately for Happy. She loved him to pieces for whatever reason. She never cried when he held her and her favorite game was undoubtedly 'pull Happy's hair'. Tony acquiesced to her demands by removing her from her high chair and placing her in Happy's arms.

"Could you take the little princess to her royal chambers while I discuss some things with my queen?"

He smirked at Pepper, who was unmoved by his endearments. Happy seemed to sense the tension and he adjusted his grip on Sophie, preparing to leave.

"You guys have fun with that," he said before tickling Sophie's cheek. "Your Mommy and Daddy are silly people, aren't they, Sophie?"

Sophie grinned a toothless grin. "'Appy."

Everyone froze. Tony's head slowly turned to the side, mirroring Pepper. They gazed at their daughter, who had eyes for no one but the man holding her.

"What did she say?" Pepper breathed.

As if understanding her mother's question, Sophie screwed her face up and spoke carefully: "Ha...ppy. Ha-ppy. Happy! Happy Happy!"

Happy's jaw dropped. He hadn't looked this… well, happy since the day the twins were born. "She- she said my name! I can't believe… this is amazing!"

"Happy! Happy!"

"That's right, I am Happy! You're so smart. You're the smartest girl ever, Sophie."

"Happy!"

As Sophie kept squealing and Happy spun her around, Tony and Pepper slid into the shadows, forgotten and betrayed by their own first born.

"I say we fire him," Tony hissed at Pepper.

"We're not firing Happy, Tony," Pepper hissed back.

"Okay, well let's dock his pay."

"For what? Stealing our baby's first word? That's not a crime."

"It should be! Fine, we'll let the air out of his tires. He'll hate that."

"Tony…"

"Look at that, Pepper. That's our baby. _Our_ baby."

"Happy Happy Happy!" Sophie continued to shout, as Happy held her over his head and spurred her on.

Pepper's eyes darkened. "I'll get the nails."

"I love you, Pep," Tony said.

"I love you, too, Tony."


End file.
